The Ant and the Grasshopper

 The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
 house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's
 a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter,
 the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know
 why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are
 cold and starving.

 CBS, NBC, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering
 grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a
 table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How
 can it be that, in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is to
 suffer so? Then a representative of the NAGB (the national association
 of green bugs) shows up on Nightline and charges the ant with green
 bias, and makes the case that the grasshopper is the victim of 30 million
 years of greenism.

 Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody
 cries when he sings "It's not easy being green" Bill and Hillary Clinton
 make a special guest appearance on the CBS Evening News to tell a
 concerned Dan Rather that they will do everything they can for the
 grasshopper who has been denied the prosperity he deserves by those
 who benefited unfairly during the Reagan summers.

 Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where
 the news stations film the group singing "We shall overcome." Jesse then
 has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake. Al
 Gore exclaims in an interview with Peter Jennings that the ant has gotten
 rich off the back of the grasshopper, and calls for an immediate tax hike
 on the ant to make him pay his fair share".

 Finally, the EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Greenism Act,"
 retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing
 to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to
 pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.

 Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a
 defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of
 federal welfare moms who can only hear cases on Thursday's between
 1:30 and 3PM.

 The ant loses the case. The story ends as we see the grasshopper
 finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house
 he's in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around
 him since he doesn't know how to maintain it. The ant has disappeared
 in the snow. And on the TV, which the grasshopper bought by selling most
 of the ant's food, they are showing Bill Clinton standing before a
 wildly applauding group of Democrats announcing that a new era of
 "fairness" has dawned in America.

   Author Jim Quinn, WRRK FM 97 in Pittsburgh
   http://www.warroom.com